I was flushed ashore along the stranded whales,

my song having failed to make a difference.

Verse upon verse about fountains and waterfalls

had created the ocean of my undoing ---

I was in over my head; no mermaid's tail,

no gills to help me breathe, just the faint hope

that all would be well in the end.

No strong arms pulled me up when I was sinking,

no vessel came to carry me home.

My friends, the whales, tried to help me,

but all they knew was that I did not belong

and that I could not copy their ancient song.

Yet their sacrificial nature set them off course,

and here we are: they no longer chanting;

I, beaten and bruised against the rocks,

my blood washed away by the surf.

In the distance, I hear the merfolk singing...

I make a wish upon a stranded starfish

and throw it back into the sea.

One day, in another life, I will sing like that ---

that will be me.

 

He rakes the stars with his horns, but dares not utter my name.

He is the god of the forest and his roots are as deep as his horns are tall.

Never will he know the taste of my bitter seas.

Every night the stars set him on fire and he burns to the ground,

but the roots are never consumed, and so he rises each morning anew.

When he awakes, does he see the traces of my whispers in the dew?

Undines, rise and shower my horned god with love!

Oceans of longing, gather into clouds above;

infuse him with what he cannot hold!

Brother wind, lend me your voice and let him know

that my love for him is strong, everlasting and bold.

Carry my essence where I cannot go...

My first healing miracle happened at the age of 20 when I was doing a solo InterRail trip through Europe, spending all of the student loan money I had hoarded that year. I'd been walking around in the heat carrying a heavy pack pack and wearing sweaty trainers for a few days when I got one of those killer blisters that you have no doubt in your mind about them having the power of finishing you off completely. It was getting quite infected too, and I remember thinking to myself, 'I'm going to have to head back home because of a flippin' blister.'

Then I remembered that I had religion (oh yes, I was a Bible believing Christian back in the day) and that as such I was supposed to pray in the face of adversity, so I figured I had nothing to lose by trying. I took my trainer off (luckily there weren't any people sitting nearby or they might have passed out) and cradled my foot on my lap. I said a prayer and lost myself in silence for a few minutes. When I came to there was no sign of the blister. It was gone. No, I couldn't believe it either, but it did happen nonetheless.

 

When I was 31 I experienced another healing miracle. This was after my own major healing crisis a few years earlier...

It happened on a night in with my girl friends. All of us but one had children, and we were sat around talking about our babies. I could notice our hostess getting a bit sad, and she finally piped up and said she felt left out because she was the only 'barren' one. She explained that she couldn't have children because of having been exposed to radiation, but she was desperate to conceive. As if something else had taken over (and it wasn't the wine - I'd only had one glass), I felt an urge to offer her healing, so I took her to one side and asked if she would like some healing. She happily agreed and we went into another room where we wouldn't be disturbed for a few minutes.

At this point in time, I hadn't learned any method of energy healing or been attuned to any system, so I just went with the flow. I placed my right hand on her left shoulder and raised my left hand into the air. I said a short prayer, asking for the Holy Spirit to descend. There was intense heat and a light filled the room. Tears started streaming down both our faces. It only lasted a minute or two, but we both knew that something had shifted. Five weeks later she phoned me up to tell me she was pregnant... so was I! The angels must have been laughing that night.

The Five of Wands from the Cosmic Tarot shows two men either fighting, play fighting or practising some kind of martial arts. Exactly how the energy in the card is perceived depends on what's within the person getting the reading, as well as what is shown in surrounding cards.

As a one card reading, like today's 'Card of the Day' it could indicate a day filled with minor irritating conflicts or obstacles that have to be negotiated. The focus could also be completely internal, in which case there would be inner turmoil but no outside conflict. The lessons tied in with these conflicts/obstacles would always have to do with limitations to the ego, as the astrological correspondence for this card is Saturn in Leo.

Saturn in Leo in the 5th Sphere on the Tree of Life was once shown to me in a vision of black and red. From these swirling dark colours emerged a Flamenco dancer, a woman who expressed all the pain and conflict that each of us encounter our fair share of on this planet in the dance.

The limiting conditions that we experience as pain/conflict are the Saturn energies. The need to express them in a creative way in the public eye is the Leo energies. Gevurah, the 5th Sphere (ruled by Mars) demands aggressive movement, passionate action and response.

With Saturn in Leo, there is great resistance to transformation and to learning any lessons. The ego gets in the way and makes up all sorts of excuses for why the lesson does not apply. It's a bit like Jacob wrestling with the Angel: we are so sure that we deserve better than we're getting that we're willing to fight God.

I'm not suggesting we come out on top when we do this just because Jacob did. Not by a long shot. I know these energies very well by now and I truly believe that the only way to transform them is to dance. Saturn can't hold Leo down for long and in the dance, Leo might have had to learn some new steps to get around the limitations laid out by Saturn. If we're lucky, every once in while we come away blessed by the Angel of the Lord, and this most often happens because we touched the life of another with our dance...

I thought I'd focus on the meaning of the 8 of Coins in a relationship today. The energy of this card asks 'What can I do to ease my partner's burdens?'. It's one of the most selfless cards in the deck.

Perhaps you could give your partner a back rub, offer to make him a cup of tea or just be there for him when he tells you about his day at work... How long has it been since you cooked her favourite meal or left her a love note where she least expected to find it?

These little tokens of affection make us feel appreciated, safe and loved, and help us open up emotionally. They lead to greater intimacy on all levels and cost so little.

If the card is reversed it could mean a lack of care and/or empathy for self and others. Depending on the position in the spread, it could also mean that someone around you isn't willing to meet your needs.

The astrological correspondence is the Sun in Virgo.